You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Randomize
