Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
