I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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