guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
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