so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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