it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
