How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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