it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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