How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize