i always forget guys have bellybuttons
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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