Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
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