Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
