if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize