oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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