No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize