Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize