I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
