I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize