And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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