The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
