With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
