She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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