I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
