I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
she smelled like a LAN party
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize