Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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