but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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