therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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