I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
