So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
