bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
