So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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