Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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