I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
operation harelip BJ is a go
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
