Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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