God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize