i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Two words: blizzard sex
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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