Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
