I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize