Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
