YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
