How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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