it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
