I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize