the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
It's just like the Real World with babies
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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