No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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