I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
