I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
