she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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