I accidentally had phone sex last night
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I need help removing her.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
