I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
